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Naughty Winter Holiday Greeting Cards

Adult Christmas Gifts     Stocking Stuffers     X-Rated Christmas Chocolates     Holiday Lingerie

Adult Christmas Gift Wrap & Bags

We'll send your card as a gift, write your message in the blank provided on billing page and the recipient's address.  Cards are sold all year long!

Up to 6 cards only will ship 6.80 USPS Priority mail, shipping will be changed after you place your order.

Click on pictures for detail - Available all year!

New Cards

 Outside:  Remember, the size of the package isn't important.

 Inside:  Okay.  Like Hell it's not!  Merry Christmas!!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.50


 Outside:  For Christmas I wanted to give you something you've always wanted!

 Inside:  Hope you always wanted a card.  Merry Christmas!!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  He see you when you're sleeping  . . .

 Inside:  and he likes what he sees.

 5 x 7" 

  $2.50


 Outside:  Happy Holidays from those of us that have known you both for a long, long, time.

 Inside:  - and like you anyway.

 5 x 7" 

  $2.50


 Outside:  First I was going to stop over for Christmas then I thought of coming over wearing something Tight and Sexy!  Then I thought of coming over wearing nothing but an Overcoat!

 Inside:  Then I thought "Naw, I'll send a card.  Merry Christmas!           5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  (as shown)

 Inside:  Sometimes "Bah, Humbug" Just Isn't Enough!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.50


 Outside:  No gifts for you . . .

 Inside:  You've been an asshole this year.

 5 x 7" 

  Out of Stock


 Outside:  It's the perfect gift to keep your north pole . . .

 Inside:  . . . from going south!

 5 x 7"      Click here for chocolate v-pills.

  $2.95


 Outside:  Eat Your Vegetables

 Inside:  Have a Healthy Happy Holiday Season!

 5 x 7"      Click here for chocolate carrots and here for naughty chocolate snowmen.

  $2.95


 Outside:  I spent most of my precious time thinking about your Christmas present . . .

 Inside:  (as shown)

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  Holiday Riddle:  What can a woman put behind her ears to make herself more attractive to men?

 Inside:  Her Knees!  Happy Holidays

 5 x 7" Tri Fold

 

 

  $2.99


 Outside:  This little gingerbread house has been made especially for you!  It has a fluffy frosting roof, pinwheel peppermint decorations, a gumdrop fence, and inside . . .

 Inside:  . . . a black licorice whip.  Happy Holidays you pervert.

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  Ironically Santa was into "naughty" in his spare time.

 Inside:  Hope your holidays are whipped into a frenzy!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  As Shown

 Inside:  Where the Fuck is that FAT OLD FART SANTA?

 5 x 7" 

  $2.75


 Outside:  I heard GOOD GIRLS get treats in their Christmas stockings . . .

 Inside:  but BAD GIRLS like me get a HUNK OF COAL!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.00


 Outside:  The Jumbo Dicky Switch Plate (as shown, inside, card has adhesive dots to apply to your existing light switch cover.)

 Inside:  Time to turn on Santa's North Pole! 

 5 x 7" 

  $3.95


Christmas

 Outside:  Do not open until Christmas

 Inside:  Unless you want Santa to come early this year.

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  I Didn't Believe in Santa . . .

 Inside:  Now I Believe!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  Happy to See Me?

 Inside:  Or is that a yule log in your pants?  Let's fire it up this Christmas.

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  If you're going to eat too much, drink too much and party too much this holiday season...

 Inside:  You might as well spend too much on a present for me.  Merry Christmas!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  Oh, I'm gettin' nuthin' for Christmas!  Santa says I've been bad!

 Inside:  Asshole.

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:   Wishing you a stress-free Holiday Season.

 Inside:  Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha. 

(That was a good one, huh?!)

 5 x 7" 

                              $2.95


 Outside:  Some women insist on exquisite jewelry or expensive perfumes for the holidays, but not me . . .

 Inside:  I'm more than willing to settle for cash.  Season's Greetings

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:   (Fruitcake) I feel like nobody really likes me . . . (psychiatrist thinking to himself) Fruitcake.

 Inside:  Happy Holidays

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  As shown

 Inside:  It's beginning to smell a lot like Christmas!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  As shown

 Inside:  You're the DRIVING FORCE behind my joy this Christmas!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  (guy) Where do you want to hang the mistletoe?  (lady) how about around your waist?

 Inside:  Hope this Christmas blows all the others away.  Merry Christmas!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  I've got something bulging in my pants pocket that's long and hard that I know you'd love to lick and suck, but hey . . .

 Inside:  . . . who can't resist a Candy Cane at Christmas time?  P.S. Of course, if you were thinking of something else, I have that, too.     5 x 7" 

   $2.95


 Outside:  If you were expecting something BIG from me for Christmas . . .

 Inside:  unbutton my pants.    

5 x 7" 

 

                            $2.95


 Outside:  Dreaming of you . . .

 Inside:  At Christmas!

 5 x 7" 

   $2.95


 Outside:  Just thought I'd let you know. . .

 Inside:  . . . I've been thinking about you this Christmas!

 5 x 7" 

   $2.95


 Outside:  Here's A Great Stocking Stuffer

 Inside:  As shown

 5 x 7" 

                              $2.95


 Outside:  As Pictured

 Inside:  Hey, What's Christmas Without Stocking Stuffers!

    

     $2.95


 Outside:  Half the fun of getting a present . . .

 Inside:  is unwrapping it.  Merry Christmas!

    

     $2.95


 Outside:  I love holiday traditions.  Trimming the tree roasting chestnuts, singing carols and my favorite . . .

 Inside:  . . . you kissing me under the mistletoe.

 5 x 7"

     $2.95


  Outside:  Of course your Christmas gift from me will be very tasteful . . .

  Inside:  Make that tasty!     5 x 7" 

                                 $2.95


 Outside:  Happy Holidays

 Inside:  Wishing you the best of the season- no ifs, and, or butts!

 5 x 7" 

                             $2.95


 Outside:  As shown

 Inside:  Hope Santa stuffs your stocking with what you really want!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  As shown

 Inside:  I'd love to 'Stuff Your Stocking' this Christmas!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


Outside:  Happy Holidays to the Great Outdoorsman

 

Inside:  Why not Cum inside?

Tri Fold

 

    

     $2.99


Outside:  Can you guess what's in the box for your?  Here's a hint . . .

 

Inside:  It's Pink!  Happy Holidays

Tri Fold

 

   $2.99


Outside:  I know red and green are Christmas colors, but I think you'll like what I'm giving you better. . .

Inside:  It's Pink!

Tri Fold

   $2.99  Out of Stock


Outside:  Oh, by gosh, by golly  . . .

Inside:  Your gift is behind the mistletoe and holly.  Merry Christmas!

 

    

   $2.95


Outside:  . . . and the stockings were hung with care

 

Inside:  Wishing you a 'well-hung' Holiday

Tri Fold

    

   $3.50


Outside:  If your nights get a little too cold . . .

 

Inside:  Here's a some extra WOOD to light your fire!  Happy Holidays

Tri Fold

    

   $2.99


Outside:  He's serving up Breakfast in Bed for the Holidays!

 

 Inside:  Hot Sausage and Eggs!

Tri Fold

 

    

   $2.99


Outside:  Guess what your Holiday present is?

 

Inside:  a HUNK of chocolate!

Tri Fold

  (Don't forget to include some chocolate!)

    

   $2.95


Outside:  as shown

Inside:  Dashing through the snow!

5 x 7" 

    

     $2.95


Outside:  as shown

Inside:  He's lying on your Christmas present. - 5 x 7" 

                                $2.95


Outside:  as shown

Inside:  A lay in the manger

5 x 7" 

    

     $2.95


Outside:  He's keeping your Christmas Present . . .

Inside:  under his hat!  Happy Holidays

5 x 7" 

    

     $2.95


Outside:  Jingle Balls

Inside:  Jingle All the Way!  Happy Holidays

5 x 7" 

    

     $2.50


Outside:  Santa:  What would you like for Christmas, Momma?  Mrs. Santa:  I'd like to ride a horny young stud til his balls turn blue!

 Inside:  Hope you get your Xmas wish!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


Outside:  Him:  I know where we can hang out under some mistletoe later!  Her:  Is that a candy cane in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?

 Inside:  It's the holidays, I'm always glad to see you!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


Outside:  You Can't Fool Me With That Innocent Little Grin!

 Inside:  I've Seen You When You're Supposed to Be Sleeping!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  Merry Christmas!

 Inside:  Maybe you'll get a Snow Blower!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


Outside:  Oooh, Look at the snowballs on him!

Inside:  Have a Ball (or two) this Christmas.

5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  as shown

 Inside:  Wishing you the warmth of the holiday season.

 5 x 7"  (this goes great with our Yellow Snow!)

   OUT OF STOCK


Outside:  I've Dropped Everything!!

Inside:  Just to Wish You A Merry Christmas

5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  - As Shown -

Inside:  Don't Sleep Under The Christmas Tree With Anyone Else But Me!

5 x 7" 

   $2.95


 Outside:  I'll Hope to see You for Chirstmas . . .

 Inside:  If You're Not Too TIED UP!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  This Christmas you can call me Ebenezer . . .

 Inside:  . . . because I want to SCROOGE you all night long!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  Is that a candy cane in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

 Inside:  Merry Christmas from your favorite laptop.

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  It's Christmas . . .

 Inside:  It's okay to bite off more than you can chew.

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  Sorry I ate your Christmas present.  So, to make up for it . . .

 Inside:  feel free to eat me!  Merry Christmas you cannibal!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  Of course your Christmas gift from me will be very tasteful . . .

 Inside:  Make that tasty!     5 x 7" 

                               $2.95


 Outside:  Christmas is my favorite time of the year . . . trimming the tree . . . wrapping presents . . . singing carols . . .  and

 Inside:  Being kissed under the mistletoe

 5 x 7" 

   $2.95


 Outside:  Santa won't be bringing you what you asked for this year!

 Inside:  They don't make peckers that big!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  About your Christmas Gift . . .

 Inside:  . . . it's in the bag.  Merry Christmas

 5 x 7" 

                             $2.95


 Outside:  How 'bout some holiday decorating at my house . . .

 Inside:  It'll sure get us into the Christmas spirit!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  Kiss me!

 Inside:  Under the mistletoe.

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  Santa makes a list of naughty people . . .

 Inside:  Congratulations!  You were named #1!  Merry Christmas

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  How 'bout some holiday decorating at my house . . .

 Inside:  It'll sure get us into the Christmas spirit!

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  This Christmas

 Inside:  May visions of sugar canes dance in your bed  Merry Christmas

 5 x 7" 

   $2.95


 Outside:  Christmas Fun with Dick and Jane

See Jane. See Jane have a Merry Christmas.  See Spot.  See Spot have a Merry Christmas.  See Dick.  See Dick gripe about holiday traffic, expenses, and family stress.

 Inside:  Don't be a Dick.  Enjoy the Holidays.                          5 x 7" 

                               $2.95


 Outside:  There we go!  (Santa is scribbling on his list)

 Inside:  You didn't make Santa's naughty or nice list . . . but you're at the top of his shit list!  Merry Christmas

 5 x 7" 

    $2.95


  Outside:  Warmest Wishes

  Inside:  are coming your way!  Happy Holidays

                              5 x 7"

                                $2.50


 Outside:  SCREW THE SNOW! 

  Inside:  This is the Life!  Merry Christmas!

  5 x 7"

  $2.95


 Outside:  If you were expecting something BIG from me this Christmas . . .

 Inside:  open my bra!

 5 x 7" 

 

                              $2.95


 Outside:  You know what they say . . . Good things come in small packages.

 Inside:  Unless, of course, we're talking about the size of your dick.  Merry Christmas!

 5 x 7" 

    Out of Stock


 Outside:  Half the fun of getting a present . . .

 Inside:  is unwrapping it.  Merry Christmas!

 5 x 7" 

    $2.95


 Outside:  Good News!  Santa says you're on his gift list.

 Inside:  Or maybe he said SHIT LIST . . . It wasn't a very good connection.  Happy Holidays

 5 x 7" 

  $2.95


 Outside:  If You Don't Like My Xmas Gift . . .

 Inside:  As Shown (Santa suggesting you can kiss his mistletoe tattooed ass)

 5 x 7" 

                               $2.95


 Outside:  Have a great, fantastic, wonderful super Christmas!

 Inside:  If you can't manage that, don't fuck it up for everyone else.

 5 x 7" 

 


A Gay Holiday

  Outside:  Hey!  Let's Hit the Slopes Together . . .

  Inside:  . . . and Hope We Hump Into Each Other!    5 x 7"

                               $2.95


Thanksgiving

  Outside:  Is that a Pop-UP thermometer in your pocket or ar you just happy to see me?

  Inside:   Now, that's something to be thankful for.  Happy Thanksgiving! 

  5 x 7"

   $2.95


Adult Christmas Gifts    Stocking Stuffers    X-Rated Christmas Chocolates    Holiday Lingerie

 

If you didn't see an item that you wanted, call or EMAIL us with your request.

Allergy Warning:  All chocolates we sell may contain and are made in facilities that use tree nuts, peanuts, soy, corn and/or dairy.

Chocolate Fantasies, © 1998-2009 All rights reserved.

The contents of this web site, chocolatefantasies.com, are copyright protected.  Under no circumstances may any of our copyrighted products, name of products, text, photographs, background graphics and/or thumbnails be reproduced or used in any way without our written permission.  All of our products are represented to the best to our knowledge, however some packaging, color and products may vary slightly.  Chocolate weights and pieces per pound are approximate.

LLK, Inc., LLK Ventures, Inc. - Chocolate Fantasies are registered names.